Thursday, May 16, 2019

Hello World! I'm Katie.

A month ago, I posted about changing my name on all my accounts to just my initials. This was just temporary. Now I can finally reveal my shiny new name:

[Jeff Goldblum] Well, there it is.

I've been going by "Katie" privately for about a month and a half now. Online, I've been going by my fursona's name "Katie Pendry", or "Katie the Panda", or "ktpanda". My site is now ktpanda.org, and all the old URLs will redirect to the new one.

Needless to say, I'm still the same person, except now I can be who I truly am and not feel like I'm wearing a mask all the time.

I'd like to thank the Reddit communities /r/egg_irl, /r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns, and /r/MtF. as well as my wonderful therapist, for helping me kick my self-doubt and denial, and for showing me that every trans person's experience is different. I had built up a straw person view of what a trans person must experience, and simply dismissed all the thoughts that I might be trans because I obviously didn't meet all this strict criteria, and must therefore I must be a cis male.

Despite the fact that I've always wanted smooth, soft skin.

Despite the fact that I've despised having facial and chest hair, always keeping it shaved as short as possible, even though I hate shaving.

Despite the fact that I've always hated my voice.

Despite the fact that as a kid, I fantasized about swapping bodies with a girl in my class.

Despite the fact that I found the idea of magical transformation into a woman appealing.

Despite the fact that I once accidentally introduced myself as my mom's daughter (brain fart or subconscious wishing? I'm still not sure).

You get the picture.

But after seeing the memes on /r/egg_irl, talking to other trans people, and talking with my therapist, I came to the conclusion that whatever I ended up as, I wasn't 100% cis. I picked out a name, created a new Reddit account, and started exploring. I started taking hormones on April 24, and within a week, it was clear - I'm not genderfluid, non-binary, or any of the other labels I was trying out... I'm a girl, plain and simple.

All the friends I have come out to so far have been extremely supportive, and I am very grateful for that. I know it's not easy adjusting to a change like this, but they have been very good about using my new name and not misgendering me.

Finally, I am very thankful for the support of my loving boyfriend, Scrydan. He has been a huge source of support during my transition. It's so helpful to not have to worry about whether or not my partner will support me.

Friday, May 10, 2019

Quick update

Back in February, I promised to start blogging more often. I haven't had a lot of time to keep up with it, though. I've been spending a lot of time with my boyfriend Scrydan who I met at TFF. Even though we live a fair distance apart, we're spending as much time together as we can. This weekend, we're going to be camping at Central Plains Fur Meet southwest of Wichita.

Posts might be sparse for a bit, but hopefully I'll have some stuff to post about soon.

Friday, April 19, 2019

So what's up with the name change?

I've been trying out just using my first and middle initials instead of my full name. It's not that I don't like my name, I just wanted to try something new. Plus, it puts me in good company.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go yell at my engineers, who so far have completely failed to create the combustible lemons I requested...

Monday, April 01, 2019

Photos from Texas Furry Fiesta 2019

Well, TFF is over, and I had a blast! Thanks to @Skywind_Kitsune for driving me down there and back. This was my first furry convention, and I look forward to going to many more.

Here are a few photos that I got. Unfortunately, I didn't get names of everybody that I got photos of, so if you recognize someone, please let me know!

My friend Hexadoodle in the fursuit playground.
Lies!
Fursuit Improv
On the observation deck of Reunion tower.
@CRT_QT
Me with CandyPaws
Playing with a pizza frisbee

Thursday, March 21, 2019

My first fursuit

Yesterday, I received my first fursuit for my character Jace Pendry from GEEKpaw productions, and I love it! It fits pretty well, although it's a little tight. It gets hot inside, as expected, which is why I bought an EZcooldown cooling vest.

I can't wait to show it off at TFF next week!